I’ve Always Wanted to Be in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade

I went for my pre-op appointment yesterday, where they had to draw more blood out of me just to make sure everything is still okay. I’ve had at least one blood test a month since May – can we not use some of these results? I mean, I realize that they’re not guzzling blood out of me, but I’m starting to feel like a keg at a frat party. And is there such a thing as an adhesive that DOESN’T strip skin when peeling off, ’cause damn, that really hurts.

As you can probably guess, I’ll end up asking for pain meds after surgery.

One other thing kind of concerns me. The nurse explained to me that apparently it’s pretty cramped in the abdomen area, so during laparoscopic surgery, air is blown in to make room for the surgeon to work. Lovely. It’s not like my belly and my ass are fat enough, but now they’re going to make me even more puffy. I’m having a vision of the old bitty at the beginning of Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Well, I guess Danny can just tie a rope around me so that we can both float home. It’d be cheaper than driving these days!

So you guys look for me on Thanksgiving Day. Maybe I can go down Broadway beside Snoopy. That’d be a hoot!


4 thoughts on “I’ve Always Wanted to Be in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade

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  1. I had that surgery about two years ago exactly. I took me about three weeks to totally heal from the surgery and then – and the doctors dont always tell you this so I will – expect to have problems with umm… how to put this delicately… intenstinal discomfort and rapid expulsion in the liquid form of edibles – for the next 3 to 6 months. There is nothing wrong with you when this happens. It is just a side effect from the surgery and your body getting used to not having the gall bladder around. It happens. Hopefully yours will be more shortlived than mine. Fat makes it worse. 😉 And on that note, lol…


  2. Oh yeah, I forgot to say… your blood count can change rather dramatically in a few days – much less two months, if something were to be going on in your system.

    So they have to know so they can be prepared.


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