A Day Full of Needles

Well, I suppose it wasn’t FULL of needles, but two is more than I care for in a day. It all started this morning with the flu shots at work. Hubby was in line before me and was NOT excited about the prospect. Not at all. But he got one. This from a man who almost passed out at the vet’s office when our dog got a shot. This from a man who hasn’t had a needle in him for probably ten years.

A couple of people in line ahead of us stopped after they got their shot to look at where they got stuck.

“Are you bleeding?” one woman asked.

“A little,” the other said.

“Hello?” I said. “You think you could move this conversation along for his sake?”

Hubby just kinda moaned in dread. Then it was his turn. He sat down to get his shot, just in case. I felt bad for him, especially when I saw a couple of people standing outside the break room door laughing and stopping other people as they passed by to look and laugh with them. I found it a little unnecessary, particularly when some of those people were to chickenshit to go in there and get their own shot. May they all remember his courage when they’re lying in bed with the damn flu!

Anyway, this afternoon, I had a doctor’s appointment to have two moles shaved off my back. You know, I just hate the way that sounds. It sounds like I’m the Hunchback of Notre Dame or some leper or something. Even the word mole sounds gross. Like the dude from the last Austin Powers movie (moleymoleymoleymoley).

But since I have this nagging skin cancer thing going in my family, the doctor suggested we send these off just to make sure they’re normal. If they are, no biggie; I can have the other moles removed at my own leisure unless they change in color, shape, etc. If they’re precancerous, I’ve gotta have all of them removed. Yeah, looking forward to that scenario.

And while I’ve met my deductible for the year (Thanks, gall bladder surgery!), I thought I’d have these cysts removed from my scalp that I inherited from my father, but I have to go to a surgeon because, as my doctor said, “The scalp is very vascular.” Mmmmrrrright.

You know, I think I’m gonna just stop there, because I sound like I need to go join the freaks at the circus.


Thoughts, anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

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